but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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