So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize