Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Randomize