nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Hello my rib-scented angel!
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
