Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
