do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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