Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize
