I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
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