can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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