He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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