Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
