I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
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