Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
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