You smell like stripper and shame
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
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