we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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