i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Just sold all of my pants in order to buy tonight's whiskey. Goodbye, high functioning alcoholism. Hello, Dad.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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