Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
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