HIV tests are more positive than that guy
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
