Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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