My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
