If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
She told me I should be a condom model.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Can you bring me the toilet please
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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