that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize
