I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
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