My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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