Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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