Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Randomize
