I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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