I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
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