You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
time to smoke my breakfast
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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