Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
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