Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
people are starting to question the shark bite story
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
