put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
