I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
