Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
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