And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
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