I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
