really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize