The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
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