Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Randomize