My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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