I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Randomize
