Texts From Last Night

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  (214): View more from Texas

  I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute

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  (214): I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute http://tfl.nu/955u
  Replies (12) Good night (825) Bad night (1366) Order T-Shirt
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  (425): View more from Washington

  be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant

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  (425): be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant http://tfl.nu/mya3
  Replies (36) Good night (707) Bad night (4656) Order T-Shirt
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  (407): View more from Florida

  Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.

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  (407): Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life. http://tfl.nu/q1vp
  Replies (38) Good night (4101) Bad night (589) Order T-Shirt
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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.

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  (859): Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out. http://tfl.nu/0ttb
  Replies (23) Good night (6006) Bad night (1433) Order T-Shirt
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  (807): View more from Ontario

  I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.

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  (807): I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing. http://tfl.nu/a3a6
  Replies (19) Good night (4514) Bad night (1161) Order T-Shirt
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment

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  (908): He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment http://tfl.nu/mluf
  Replies (10) Good night (836) Bad night (3159)
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  (906): View more from Michigan

  nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life

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  (906): nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life http://tfl.nu/phhm
  Replies (7) Good night (3846) Bad night (1258) Order T-Shirt
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.

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  (612): Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls. http://tfl.nu/jpdx
  Replies (15) Good night (3205) Bad night (1237) Order T-Shirt
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  (719): View more from Colorado

  On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.

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  (719): On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour. http://tfl.nu/o2dj
  Replies (6) Good night (3120) Bad night (580) Order T-Shirt
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.

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  (201): Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied. http://tfl.nu/g4t4
  Replies (8) Good night (3709) Bad night (733) Order T-Shirt
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.

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  (732): You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you. http://tfl.nu/wi1w
  Replies (7) Good night (3362) Bad night (1497) Order T-Shirt
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  (845): View more from New York

  Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup

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  (845): Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup http://tfl.nu/4mdx
  Replies (6) Good night (955) Bad night (437) Order T-Shirt
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  (423): View more from Tennessee

  animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful

  (1-423): View more from Tennessee

  breakfast of champions

  (423): View more from Tennessee

  breakfast of stoners

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  (423): animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful (1-423): breakfast of champions (423): breakfast of stoners http://tfl.nu/cslr
  Replies (6) Good night (1207) Bad night (457)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is

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  (317): And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is http://tfl.nu/xorh
  Replies (0) Good night (547) Bad night (176) Order T-Shirt
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  (785): View more from Kansas

  Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.

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  (785): Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas. http://tfl.nu/amy7
  Replies (6) Good night (733) Bad night (124) Order T-Shirt

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