And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize
