"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize
