I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
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