I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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