U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
