Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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