she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
The beers last night were like the tears from god
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Randomize
