Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
