Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
Randomize
