just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize